(This was originally written for the German-speaking Usenet as [de]PointedEars' Standard-Floskeln, abbreviated "psf". Since I like the acronym and "phrases" would have resulted in a quite ugly "psp", I do hope you forgive that little pun :-))
Last update: 2007-08-13T13:27:28+0200
Available online at
http://pointedears.de/psf/
Copyright © 2002-2007
Thomas 'PointedEars' Lahn.
Parts of this document can be used freely.
Other distribution of this document is asked for as
complete and unchanged content.
Created with
This neat piece of work is of course also available in a handy text format :-)
See also:
[de]Didis Standard-Floskeln (dsf)
[de]Sockes Standard-Floskeln (ssf)
*Are* *you* *really* *really* *sure*? [psf 1.1]
'n'why? [psf 1.2]
What'sthat? [psf 1.3]
Who'sthat? [psf 1.4]
'n'where? [psf 1.5]
Do I have to know him/her/this? [psf 1.6]
You miss'd a `not', did you not? [psf 1.7]
This sentence sense? [psf 1.8]
You never learn enough, do you? [psf 1.9]
Kid, go playing, here is technics. [psf 2.1]
Your Shift key is borken. [psf 2.2]
Your Exclamation/Question Mark key is borken. [psf 2.3]
You should get a new keyboard. [psf 2.4]
[_] You have thought this through (thoroughly enough) before posting. [psf 2.5]
[_] This belongs here. [psf 2.6]
_You_ are the beginner. [psf 2.7]
[X] You only know Microsoft Windows. [psf 2.8]
[X] You only know Internet Explorer. [psf 2.9]
I do always hope for the best in humans.
You have just teached me the opposite. [psf 2.10]
[_] You screwed up my day! [psf 2.11]
You saved my day! :) [psf 2.12]
I am sorry to say that your vocabulary does not form
a non-empty intersecting set with mine. [psf 2.13]
[ ] You read
[_] You understood. [psf 2.14]
Self-awareness is the first step to better yourself. [psf 3.1]
You cannot have everything. [psf 3.2]
There is a first time for everything. [psf 3.3]
Every posting contains a tiny seed of Truth[tm]. [psf 3.4]
Only bad news are faster than Warp 10. [psf 3.5]
Shit happens. [psf 3.6]
Display resolution != desktop size != browser
window size != viewport size. [psf 3.7]
A table is a table is a table. [psf 3.8]
Moderator's duty is _not_ to answer technical questions
(via e-mail) but to see for law and order in the forums. [psf 4.1]
Where's no input, there's no output. [psf 4.2]
^^^ ;-)
A lack of minimum clue regarding a specific field of knowledge seems
to be the best qualification for some people to solve complex problems
and to understand solutions of others on exactly this field. [psf 4.3]
I translate that to "I use a software for my Web design of which I
have no clue how it works. Now I do not know what settings I need
to make it work like I want it to work. HELP!!1" [psf 4.4]
This is the same in green. [psf 4.5]
*This* is how a shoe is done. [psf 4.6]
End of area. [psf 4.7]
<prayer_wheel> Even SELFHTML is not a golden cow, containing
errors and insufficient information. </prayer_wheel> [psf 4.8]
Copy & paste is not enough, you need to use mind & reason. [psf 4.9]
You can never learn too much. [psf 4.10]
"Does not work" is a useless error description. [psf 4.11]
There is always something wrong. [psf 4.12]
Four get it. [psf 4.13]
That's it. [psf 4.14]
Straynge. [psf 4.15]
This is a *news*group. [psf 4.16]
And the moon consists of green cheese. [psf 4.17]
By repeating false statements (over and over again)
they do not become more true. [psf 4.18]
*beep* *bleep* *bounce* *sweep*
Hm...Gooshie says that with a statistical probability of 97.3% further
postings from you are unwished and thus will be removed by me. But:
"The future is not set. There is no fate but what we make for ourselves."
[psf 5.1]
Google is your friend. [psf 6.1]
When will Google finally become a school subject? [psf 6.2]
"No"°[tm]. [psf 6.3]
The Subject should tell shortly about the contents of the posting for
people to know what they are downloading and for what they are possibly
spending more money. [psf 7.1]
Every user and every posting have the same importance. Trying
to arouse interest in your posting by special features of your
Subject makes it not more interesting but the opposite in most
cases and often pisses people off. [psf 7.2]
This GABELN do not work according to the baby scheme
('WANNAHAVE!!!' -- 'Here you are!'). Nobody is a
posting-reading professional here. [psf 7.3]
Please watch more for the style of your postings. By using
correct spelling, grammar, punctuation and separation of
paragraphs your postings becomes easier legible. [psf 7.4]
If you watch this GABELN for a while, you will note that
not the names are repeating but the "content" is. [psf 7.5]
[X] There is a special GABELN for such questions.
[_] It is this GABELN.
[psf 7.6]
Private e-mail exists. [psf 7.7]
Those who eat with fingers should not post to GABELNs. [psf 7.8]
<prayer_wheel>
<acronym title="HyperText Markup Language">HTML</acronym>
is not a programming language. There are no HTML commands.
</> [psf 7.9]
Rational use of the "Make Uppercase" key makes your postings easier
legible and thus multiples the willingness of your readers to help you.
[psf 7.10]
Usually I fetch e-mail every other minute and reply faster to them.
As you note at last, PointedEars@web.de is my spam trap which is read
very seldom. Please only write to PointedEars@gmx.de which I used in
my Reply-To header. [psf 7.11]
It is considered polite to send mail using your real name. [psf 7.12]
(Not only) me loves to receive e-mail as plain text than as HTML.
By superfluous text formatting, the size of a HTML e-mail is more
than the double of a plain text mail containing the same information.
Please reconfigure your e-mail client accordingly. [psf 7.13]
How you post to a GABELN is how it fups out of it. [psf 7.14]
It is called attribution _line_, not attribution novel.
People who know what a message-ID is also know where
to look for it. [psf 7.15]
Posting with your full/real name is considered polite in
German-speaking Usenet and increases your chance of getting
a reasonable response. [psf 7.16]
Your signature separator is borken, please read
http://insideoe.tomsterdam.com/problems/bugs.htm#sigseparator [psf 7.17]
Go to news:newusers.infos directly,
don't pass "Start" and don't draw 4000 PLONKs. [psf 7.18]
Blank, blank, blank and never thank^H^H^Hink! [psf 7.19]
This is a public newsgroup, not private e-mail. [psf 7.20]
[1]
Hey, that's *my* line!!1 [psf 9.1]
Sigh. [psf 10.1]
[1] There's nothing here yet, but things are yet to come! :-)